Hi there! You've entered the dreaming land of a twinkling star~ (^_^)
I'm nothing but an ordinary girl with sweet and painful memories~
It's hard to make me talk as I'm not quite friendly~
If you want to know more, read my posts, you'll know me~
Struggling to live in this not-forever world~
Islam is my religion!
I swear that there is no other God except for ALLAH and MUHAMMAD is the messenger of ALLAH! (^_^)

Wishes, Dreams, Du'a

-To be a solehah daughter~
-To be a solehah wife~
-To be a solehah mother~
-To be a solehah 'abdullah~
-To be a able to teach and make my children understand Islam and this world~

THOSE ARE MY WISHES.. CAN YOU HELP ME FULFILL IT? (^_^)

March 2009

April 2009

May 2009

June 2009

July 2009

August 2009

September 2009

October 2009

November 2009

January 2010

March 2010

April 2010

May 2010

January 2012

February 2012

May 2012

June 2012

July 2012

August 2012

September 2012

October 2012

January 2013

My tumblr <3

Kak Maryam <3

Hudaidy Hady <3

Nisa' Tumblr <3

Nisa' <3

Juenne <3

Maryna <3

ok... here it goes... for my lovely friends who are really worried about me,and are questioning why i seem very slanted to 'love'... ^_^
i am very sorry
i'm ok... just that i was reminded of a conversation with a friend of mine which took place not too long time ago...
as true as it is.. we can't live without men... and yes... we are nothing without men.. (just think of your father at the very least,ok...)
so i was kind of tounge-tied when they said it's hard to live without having boyfriends... just friends i think that's what they meant...
as for this truly yours... we grew up in an environment of girlfriends so for me, not having boyfriends is not a big issue to begin with...

it's not my right to say...
u're not supposed to go out with him... or
u can't do this...
obviously,i'm not in a position where i could order people according to what i feel and what i think... but a piece of advice from me,although i don't know if i have the right to say this out as i have boyfriends too but my classmates and i'm kind of close with them... but not being around them doesn't mean,i can't live and life is boring... it's a big NO NO...so here was what i said...or something like what i'm going to write... the meaning is the same... i just want to share...

"kita boleh berkawan dengan lelaki tapi untuk sebab yang munasabah... kalau kita ada perasaan kat semua kawan lelaki kita,tu bukan sesuatu yang baik... hidup ni takkan jadi bosan kalau tak berkawan dengan lelaki... hidup bukan hanya tentang perasaan antara lelaki dan perempuan,hidup bukan hanya tentang ni... dan kalau berkawan dengan lelaki tanpa sebab,akan bawa kepada sesuatu yang tak baik,lebih baik kita jauhkan diri..."

u get what i mean? it's not that i know what life has in stored for me, or i know what life is about... i am still a kid and an immature teen so there's still a lot to learn... but i believe that life is a journey so we have to keep walking in order to live and survive... maybe this opinion of mine is not true after all.. but that's what i believe... i realize that life is not all about what happen between a boy and a girl... it's not just about what they feel... there's much more than that...

Syirul tak lah baik sgt... no one knows the truth,how much happiness and sadness there is in me... tp tu biasa lah kan? kalau selalu ketawa,kita akan rasa tak lengkap... dan kalau selalu nangis, kita akan rasa terlalu penat dan bosan... kena ada manis dan masin dan masam... hidup kena ada perisa tau.. ^_^ if u get what i mean...

so that is why i posted what i posted... it's not all about me, you know? there's always a reason behind anything and everything... u get it? ^_^

so that's that... hope all of you will gain somthing from this... so may the blessings of Allah is always with you... Ameen... ^_^

cute... isn't she? always cry for her and smile for her... she's great... ^_^ love you...
stay cute and gd aways...





just took a peek at some of my lovely petals's blog,made me realize that everyone is really having a hard time actually.. Allah really loves us,doesn't He,sisters? ^_^ we should be grateful...

i really miss my life back then.. when i was a peaceful Syirulhuda who always smile and laugh and mean it.. when i was struggling to graduate from school to continue my life of seeking knowledge... but i am actually seeking what i've always need.. and seeking that needs a lot of courage... because i have to stand up again and again after falling down and injured myself.. it scarred my heart.. i miss myself when i was just an ordinary girl with dreams of being a gd daughter to her parents... a gd servant to Allah.. a gd wife to her husband and a gd mother for her children.. see? all these are just so simple... simple dreams... but actually... it's harder to achieve.. harder than any dreams...

i'm recovering i think.. i'm standing up slowly because i had a really bad fall twice..
-when i was walking down the path of tests, i fell..
-when i was trying to stand, i fell..
i injured myself and hurt my heart.. it was so bad that i can't stop crying until now... i really nedd to walk properly and carefully this time so i won't fall again.. i got cheated by someone and took that path.. haha..

to all.. just do your best,ok? good times will sure come in our way... just wait for it.. the sacrifices we made and hardships we're going through are worthy enough... just be patient alright? ^_^
haha.. i'm crying again..

and for you,girl full of little secrets... just be strong... she may die,but you're not.. you're still alive so you need to move on.. just keep her memories with you...she'll always be with you,inside you,keeping you safe... it'll be alright.... it will... you'll face everything you need to and just be yourself... love the way you are.. she is already a memory... be strong... ^_^






first of all.. i just felt like blogging but i really don't know what i'm going to talk about.. looking at people around me makes me realize that they are going through hard times themselves... it's just either they keep it to themselves or share it with others.. but most people will definitely choose to share with others their grieves so that they will feel better.. that's a gd thing for sure as what i heard is most people die because they keep everything to themselves and it's unbearable.. yeah it's right.. not gd for our heart.. but you know.. somethings are meant to be kept and hidden for it's best for all than to speak up..

too busy entertaining my own thoughts and feelings, i forgot to post something about kak Syida..
Congratulations to kak Syida.. may you have the blessings of Allah with you and your husband.. ameen.. and may you lead a gd and happy life with your love.. ^_^

well.. seeing her getting married makes me wonder when i'll be getting married..hihi.. it's hard to find a gd guy nowadays,isn't it true friends? ^_^ well.. we had fun.. we had to wait for the groom to arrive and we had to wait until nearly an hour or more.. i'm not sure.. me,ju and feesa had great time drinking and eating the nata de coco that we were given.. feesa's cup broke she had a hard time eating it.. hihi.. pity her.. and when i open mine... better if i keep it.. i was the clumsiest eater of nata de coco that day.. and thank gdness,nothing happen to ju's.. haha.. it's a great day..

ok fine..hmm.. you see.. i'm having a really hard time with myself.. friends and family.. i just want to keep both in happiness.. i think... obviously, i dislike going out too often and i just go out when i must.. i prefer living inside my house then going out.. and if i'm out, i like to be alone as i will do many hurtful things whether to myself or to others.. i'm very very weak these days but no one knows.. i'm really weak that i just don't have time to even ask or be by others' sides when they need me most.. so i'm sorry to whoever that asked me out and i said no.. i'm sorry to whoever needs me but i'm not there.. see.. i always do wrong things and say unreasonable thoughts of mine without me,myself, realizing it... so i'm really sorry if i've hurt anyone..

i'm sorry if i don't share anything with anyone as i'm used to keep it within me.. i know that some will say it's not a good thing and all but it's me.. i just think it's better this way.. you know.. i'm all right.. just leave me alone for a while and i'll be fine... that's just the way i am.. so please accept this side of me ok.. i just don't want to talk about things that will make me hurt even more.. i need to protect myself.. i'm sorry..
if i think,speaking up will make me better, then rest assured i'll say it out.. so just don't worry ok.. i'm fine..

just a piece of advice.. don't ever sigh or ask..

-why is it that no one understands us when we're trying very hard to understand them?

-why is it that no one pleases us when we're trying very hard to please them?

-why is it that no one knows what we're feeling when we're trying very hard to know what they feel?

-why is it that it's always us pleasing people here and there when they don't even appreciate it?

-why is it always us that do this and do that..

and please.. stop saying..

-i'm the one who always understand..

-i'm the one who always please..

-i'm the one who is trying..

-it's i'm the one and only me..

do you know and do you realize that everyone is trying just the same as you? do you know that they are doing that just for you like you are doing it for them? you don't look around.. you don't see.. do you know that some people are doing what you're doing but they don't ask this and that.. it's because they feel and think it's their responsibility as a human being.. as a servant of Allah..

open your eyes wider and you will see.. you will realize.. that everyone is doing just the same.. it's not only you doing this and that... so never sigh and never ask like that.. maybe it's only some people and not everyone.. is it not appreciative enough? you ought to be thankful always.. because Allah is very kind to us.. Allah always give us what we need but we are not satisfied at all and always complaining.. that's human.. it's natural.. so don't sigh ok.. it is as if you are not thankful with what you have..

during this holiday.. i've been at home.. nothing much for me to learn but it's satisfying enough that i realize many things that i didn't.. so i'm sharing with all of you here.. it's not what others had done.. it's myself that has opened this very eyes with new contact lense.. huhu..

so take what's good and what's bad for you.. saying many things sure is not good.. Astaghfirullah.. may Allah forgives me if i'm spouting nonsense here... so that's that..
^_^

ni mase gi Langkawi.. kte due and Abu je frm sem 2 yg gi.. luv u,Muneer.. ^_^
btw,Abu tkde dlm gmbr ni..huhu..



^_^ we're in sem 1..tkde klas so gi jln2 around KUIS.. frm P1 that time..



my classmates.. igt lg ni ari Jumaat..huhu.. some of them are not in this pic..



biro mknn kt Seminar kt KUIS.. first time jd AJK.. it was tough.. but we had a great time..



my roommate,kak Su.. thnks for being there all the time..



it's raining.. the clouds are cloudy.. it's cold.. but it's not freezing..

if i'm in KUIS right now, i'm sleeping on my not-so-cosy bed but comfy enough for a girl like me.. oh bed.. wait for me.. hikhik.. i'm missing KUIS badly..
but if i'm there,i'll be missing home terribly.. i love both so i want both.. isy2.. ok.. these are some pics in KUIS.. dh lame gmbr2 ni.. tp nk letak..
ni mase baru2 masuk.. sem 1 and 2.. akn dtg ni.. dh jd senior.. masuk sem 3 plk.. hmm.. life sure is hard.. but everything's going to be fine isn't it? i'm sure it'll be.. i must go on.. walk on the path of truth and move on.. life is after all a journey.. gd luck,Syirul..






THE VALUE OF A WOMAN:
Beautifully Said..
Be Careful If You Make A Woman Cry.. Because God Counts Her Tears..

A Woman Came Out Of A Man's Rib..
Not From His Feet To Walked On..
Not From His Head To Be Superior Over..
But From His Side To Be Equal..
Under The Arm To Be Protected..
And Next To The Heart To Be Loved..


Nilai Seorang Wanita:
Hati-Hati Jika Kamu Membuat Seorang Wanita Menangis.. Kerana Tuhan Mengira Titisan Air Matanya..

Hawa Diciptakan Dari Tulang Rusuk Adam..
Bukan Dari Kepalanya Untuk Dijadikan Atasnya..
Bukan Juga Dari Kakinya Untuk Dijadikan Alasnya..
Melainkan Dari Sisinya Untuk Dijadikan Teman Hidupnya..
Dekat Pada Lengan Untuk Dilindunginya..
Dan Dekat Di Hati Untuk Dicintainya..

Nilai Seorang Muslimah..
Bukan Terletak Pada Kecantikan, Atau Paras Rupanya..
Tapi Terletak Pada Hati Yang Luhur..
Perasaan Yang Ikhlas..
Iman Dan Taqwanya..

Nilai Seorang Muslim..
Bukan Terletak Pada Keegoan, Atau Nafsu Satu-Satunya..
Tapi Terletak Pada Hati Yang Cekal..
Keadilan Dalam Kepmpinan..
Iman Dan Taqwanya.. sun goes down and we are here together
fireflies glow like a thousand charms..
stay with me and u can dream forever
right here in my arms..tonight..

it's magic when u are here beside me
close ur eyes and let me hold u tight..
everything that u could ever need is
right here in my arms..tonight..

sounds of day..
fade away..
stars begin to climb..
melodies fill the breeze..
sweeter all the time..

*just felt like typing this lullaby lyrics frm barbie..
it's about the mother and daughter.. ^_^
Alhamdulillah.. mkin rmai kwn2 Syirul yg dh buat blog utk tujuan yg baik.. Syirul pun nk buat blog sndiri.. mksudnye nk edit blog sndiri ikut citarasa Syirul,ape yg Syirul nk.. tgk yg lain sume,i'm truly impressed.. congrats girls..

syirul ni tgh sakit kepale.. btl2 sakit.. td mlm baru smpai Spore dr M'sia..
pnt byk menanti dan brjln.. tu je.. Alhamdulillah Nadia's interview went well.. just doakn smoga dia dpt masuk yea.. Ameen..

and like always..i'm confused.. heartache..headache.. brpusing2 dunia ni..
i'm missing KUIS terribly.. smlm tgk DQ,smpai trbyg2 yg tu KUIS.. huhu.. teruk kn..
igt nk ikut kak Yu balik sbb kak Yu ambk MUET,die balik awl.. tp byk lg yg prlu dislsaikn kt sini.. hmm.. mcm2 prkr.. i just want to lead a simple and peaceful life.. but it's so hard.. ni lh namenye dugaan kn.. klau tkde dugaan pun,sunyi jgk hidup.. kdg2 bile jd mcm2 baru kte sdr kte slame ni lalai dan sbnrnye Allah tu sntiase ade dgn kte.. ne? ^_^

for all who know me,all the best for ur journey of life... it may get tougher in front, but it's part and parcel of life.. it's for ur own gd frm Allah,specially for u.. keep that in mind all right.. and that's that for all.. have a gd day! ^_^

-Syirulhuda- i'm feeling terrible these few days but i don't know why.. it's hard to tell.. maybe it's due to hormone changes.. haha.. going to M'sia tomorrow and i'm really tired.. actually, i can easily become tired but only these few days.. i wonder why i'm like this.. so 'it' takes advantage and keep harassing me until i found no way ut except to ask for help again and again..

as a servant, i feel embarrassed to seek help from Allah continuosly but still committing sins whether in awareness or not.. but i'm very confident that Allah always there.. so as servants, we should aware of this that Allah always bless us no matter who we are.. so we must be thankful and try not to commit any wrong actions..

went to kak Syida's wedding and she was very beautiful.. suddenly feel like i want to get marry quickly.. huhu.. wel... it's a girl's dream anyway.. it's normal,, right? hihi..
selamat pengantin baru to kak Syida.. and all the best to me..^_^ and to all..

so gtg now.. need to wake up early tomorrow.. =o i'm sleepy.. nite nite..

-Syirulhuda- pls for gdness sake... just go away... pls..! don't disturb me anymore..
i've had enough.. it's very tiring,and it's taking my energy away every secs.. it's hard for me to breathe properly,think or even feel the way i should.

after this, what will happen then? will things go back to normal? but no.. i don't want. jika dia ingin menyayangiku,dia mstilh menyayangiNYA trlbh dahulu... everything has changed..yes, it has... although i don't want it to be this way.. but it's the only way for me to prevent things from happening again.. bad things.. i can't let them happen again..

pls Ya Allah..-_- i'm pleading.. my heart doensn't want to change but i'm losing it from me too.. pls give me a chance for me to meet him and seek the truth.. i plead ya Rabb.. help this weak slave of yours.. i plead.. pls.. i'm losing me energy but i insist on fighting.. so pls... kesian kat kak Yu... i woke up and realised she was down with fever.. panas giler bdn die.. tp dh ok skrg.. jgn2 sbb die tension tgk Syirul tk ok2 pkai contact lens.. hihi.. tkde lh.. memain jek.. ^_^

td bincang2 ngn mk psl 'sakit' syirul ni.. and my suggestion to go to kulai for treatment.. rupe2nye mk dh ckp dgn bpk and he agrees to it Alhamdulillah.. cume skrg ni kene cari mase yg sesuai aje utk trskn.. mk kate, org yg mengubatkn ni mcm nk cari jodoh.. kene serasi dan sesuai,skali je prgi, insyaAllah dh ok.. tp klau tk sesuai,tk serasi, prgi byk kali pun tk tentu kte akn pulih.. Syirul hrp sgt kali ni Syirul serasi dgn org ni dan skali ni je.. becos i'm already too tired and i have to fight by myself after this.. syirul mntk.. skali ni je.. lps tu syirul nk hidup dlm keadaan tenang. pape pun, syirul tetap akn lwn dan tk akn skadar hrpkn org utk bantu je. doa2lh.. ameen.. mntk2 yg ni serasi.

and another one.. renungkn lh ye kate2 ni..
"jika dia ingin menyayangiku,dia mstilh menyayangiNYA trlbh dahulu"
rmai yg slh anggp dgn kate2 ni.. kte kene lh alami,baru kdg2 kte blh fhm mksud yg trsirat dan ape yg trsurat.. syirul tk tau mknenye pd syirul btl atau tk.. tp insyaAllah tk trsilap.. fhm2 lh ye.. huhu..

k2.. tuan puteri si bujur sirih nk gune lappynye.. syirul nk mkn lh.. lpr plk.. kikik.. so c ya then! oh aah! nk share lg 1 brita happy.. adk syirul dpt interview kt DQ!! Alhamdulillah.. insyaAllah die dpt masul DQ.. interview nyw nxt Tuesday.. doakn lh die dpt masuk ye.. smoga jln yg die pilih,tepat utk die.. Ameen..

k gtg now..c ya! ^_^

-Syirulhuda- aduih... mcm ade bende hidup dlm mate Syirul ni.. aduh aduh aduh... *blink blink
first time pkai contact lens... mcm nk pengsan bile nk masukkn... ni pun kak Yu yg masukkn... die kate,pelan2 nnt bljr sndiri...

mata ni asik nk trkelip je.. last2,kak Yu tgk,die yg give up,die yg masukkn.. aduh.. mcm nk garuk2 je mata ni... klakar giler... syirul ni dh lh jenis penggeli.. hbs nk ktw tk hbs2... kwn syirul nk pkaikn celak je syirul dh ktw.. tu baru kt luar mata.. ni yg kt dlm mata ni asik ktw je... kak Yu yg frust... hbs kak Yu instruct mcm strict sgt3... tk leh thn,terus ktw syirul trkluar... klakar sey.. tp mcm pelik dpt nmpk dunia yg luas ni dgn begitu trg skali.. Alhamdulillah..

ni nk kene train byk kali ni.. nnt dh balik KUIS,tkkn tiap pg nk prgi kt bilik kak Yu ketuk suruh die pkaikn contact lens kn.. jd kene lh suffer skt thn sakit mata utk train diri sndiri pkai contact lens.. *blink blink hihi..

k that's all for now.. mntk2 lame trbiase pkai contact lens,blh pkai sndiri jgk at last.. ^_^
*blink blink blink
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